first post

Nearly a decade ago, three words presented themselves to me in my search to understand whether the world was fair or not. I never found an answer to that question, but I did find a variable that had the potential to make life fair: to give. This realization elevated the concept of selflessness to a level of importance I had never considered before. I began to wonder—what if something so simple, if overlooked, was like a seed never given the chance to bloom? If I could bring greater awareness to this concept—one that most people assume they already understand—perhaps I could help deepen that understanding, revealing selflessness as the very variable that could “save the world.”

I methodically decided that selflessness needed to be a conscious, daily practice. A t-shirt felt like an obvious, albeit cliché, medium to spread awareness. The first design simply had the word selflessness on it, punctuated with a period, as if to state: this is all that’s needed. To be selfless was to give—your attention, perspective, time, presence, and skills to others. Like any brand, I thought it needed a tagline. That’s when the phrase You Before Me emerged.

Nine years ago, I saw those words on my logo mockups and felt an overwhelming sense—something I struggle to put into words without sounding corny. It was like I had finally reached a point where I was capable of understanding something I had always felt but never fully grasped. So, I changed the brand name to You Before Me.

The more I studied these words, the more their meaning evolved. I remember standing in the kitchen, telling my mom, dad, and sister that this was going to be something special. The walls were painted orange at the time, the sun was filtering through the window, and an island sat in the middle of the kitchen cluttered with pots and pans. I leaned against the counter near the microwave, the refrigerator beside it. It was around six or seven in the evening, and I had no doubt these words carried something powerful.

But despite my confidence, I struggled to explain why they mattered. Over the years, people would see my t-shirt and ask, “What does You Before Me mean?” And I could never answer in a way that felt whole. I’d say something simple, like, “Oh, it’s a brand about selflessness,” and watch their unimpressed reactions dismiss it as just another cliché. Sometimes, I’d even joke that it was a friend’s brand, as if that would somehow make it more interesting. But deep down, I knew that I had something special—I just didn’t yet have the words to express it.

So, I dug deeper.

For years, I wrestled with the meaning of You Before Me, trying to articulate why it felt so profound. I built up definitions, only to tear them down and start over, ensuring the idea continued to evolve. Looking back, I now see that I had three major attempts at defining it—each one essential, each a vital piece of the larger mechanism. It was like building a machine only to realize, each time, that there were still more parts left in the box. When I finally put the pieces together, it formed a mirror.

At first glance, You Before Me might seem straightforward. But like a mirror, its meaning shifts depending on who stands before it. It is not about prioritizing others over yourself, nor is it about self-sacrifice or martyrdom. It is the beginning of a journey—a mirror voyage—where the self is understood, deconstructed, and reintegrated in a way that fosters true awareness, balance, and authenticity.

This website is my attempt to document that process, not just for myself but for anyone drawn to these ideas. Through blog posts, explanations, podcasts, and reflections, I’ll be exploring the many dimensions of You Before Me—how it connects to psychology, philosophy, religion, spirituality, and even the practical challenges of daily life.

It is a tool, a mechanism, a key to harmonizing the soul, shadow, and ego. It is a process of unbecoming and becoming. A dance of perspectives. A way to step out of projection and into reflection. A call to stand before yourself and truly see.

But like any idea, You Before Me is open to misinterpretation, criticism, and challenge. And that’s part of the journey, too.

Some may see it as self-indulgent introspection. Others may claim it contradicts religious faith or empirical reasoning. Some might mistake it for a rigid framework rather than a fluid, adaptable process. That’s why this space exists—to engage, to refine, and to explore what happens when you place the mirror in front of the mind and let it do what it does best: reflect.

It will undoubtedly be triggering to all, and observing that trigger and its origin is the goal. Discomfort is not a barrier but an invitation—to look deeper, to question, and to understand what lies beneath.

So if you’re here, whether out of curiosity, skepticism, or a deep yearning for something more—welcome.